Field of Reeds

Ohahaha, today I have a exciting news: I can go to Beijing for a five-day trip. Honestly, I have been dreaming of a trip to Beijing for a long time. The sights, the history and so on really attract me a lot, I really wanna pay a deep visit of the Forbidden City. Also, because I am a Chinese, I should go to the capital city of my own. Any way, ich freue mich darauf, dass ich endlich nach Beijing fahren kann.

It was my dream; to build up a forum about ancient Egypt. Since I was a senior school student, I was dreaming of a forum, there I can share my interests with different firends. But I also found that, most of the dominions need money, I have no money, so my plan was delaied. Instead I joined almost every forum about Egypt, however I felt that those are not satisfactory, I always wanna my own. Tow days ago, I had a rush of building up this forum I desired, and I found a website which offers free space for forum, now I have my own forum, and it is under construction. But I know that being a excellent forum is very hard, especailly being a outstanding ancient Egyptian forum.

During the second day in Cambodia, the visit of a tomb really impressed me very much. It is not exactly a tomb in the normal sense, but it is more likely to be called as a monument which is filled with skulls from uncountable victims in the past history. In cambodian history, there was once a group of communists who controlled the destiny of Cambodia, like the Cultural Revolution in China during the 1970s(Maybe), those communists persecuted a great muber of people, mainly scholars and people who have been educated. The place I visited is actually execution ground in the past, my guide told me that there were so many people were killed that later the government built a monument only for storing the skulls of those victims. Thhis was my first time to see so many skulls in front of me, so lifeless, so pale and so horrible. My heart was trembling all the time. This is really a place of the dead, the entire ground was covered by the atmosphere of death.
Walking around the monument, I could easily find the bones from the dead, I tried to avoid stepping on those bones, I was afraid to disturp those people, really I was afraid. Alone that rpad, I found that a pile of bones were collected by people, putting them into a small house made of wood, serving as a tomb, I guess.
I think human beings are the most brutal creatures on earth. There is no need to compare. People can simply kill their fellows just because of different opinions, different perspectives, differnet religions.
Yesterday I met a boy on the plane, who is studying in Yale. He too have no good feeling about religion, especailly Christianity. Those so called believers took the name of defence of religion, in fact they just wanted their own profitable interests. Those cambodian communists were the same.

I can recite a letter from German Consulate:.............regarding your situation, the processing time for you will thus be three working days only. Today is the forth day, the forth working day since my submit my application. I wait, wait and wait.This is all I can do. Since last December, I received my first schorship by DAAD, my history of waiting began. Honestly, I do have regret, this schorship troubled and continues to trouble me so greatly.
I have asked the German Consulate 4 times, when I can get my visa, they were repeatly telling me, we will call u. That's it.
Now I have a lesson from this experience, DO NOT TRUST ANY AUTHORITIES!

.......................................................................I do not know anything..............................................I have no reply from German Consulate...................................I have no reply from Freie Uni Berlin.......................I have no idea when I can receive my Visa..............................I do not know wether I can go home this week.........................I do noe know wether or not their promise is true..........................I do not know wether Tarot is acurate.........................I do not know wether or not I can go to Beijing.......................I do not know when my emotion can trun better.........................so far, I know nothing.
I really wanna cry, but cry will not help me.........................................

When I was an English beginner, I learnt an idom in English. It goes:Don't Trouble Trouble,till Trouble Troubles U. At that time, I do not really understant the meaning of this sentence, but now I do.
Since the success of the scholorship of a German language course, great number of troubles have said Hallo to me, with their terrible smiles. This winning should be a happy thing for me, I used to think. Now I rather give up the so called schlorship. Did I trouble this big trouble-schorship, so those troubles trouble me?
Without this schorship, I should be now at home, reading and planning a trip to Beijing and Xian, I should without any burdens, and worries. Or maybe I will go to Mexico for a month. Now, everything is gone, I am here, in the computer room in my Uni, waiting for the Visa into Germany, and what's more, I even do not know when they will sign my application. I spent even more money than this Godamnd schorship I know I can not wait here long, I have to go back to main land. This is my first time I hate China, the inability of China is unsurpassable. Citizen has to apply visa wherever he or she wants go, but HK citizen need not, why!!!
I also worry about my arrival in Germany, although they told me why to reach Uni and hotel, the problem is that I will have a test on the ist day of arrival from 10.00-18.00, but my plane arrive in Germany on 22.00, it is really a big joke!! I wanna cry, but I still do not know the result, any result.
My mother tole me that this maybe a good experience for me, but experiencing such a case is really painful and helpless.